LORD Jesus, give me wisdom. I have been putting my foot in my mouth a lot lately. Please give me wisdom when to speak and when to be silent. When to share and when to listen. Help me know Jesus that you are my best friend and I don't need to share all the details of what you teach me with people....You want to hear from me. You love talking with me. I don't understand it God, why you love me so much, such a sinner, but I thank you and bless you for your unfailing unconditional love for me. Help me Jesus. Give me wisdom over my words and help me to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit's leading and bind my propensity to talk too much. In Jesus name AMEN.
This has been my frequent prayer.
My precious husband and I had a great discussion a few weeks ago. He lovingly told me, "Laura, you need to be a better listener. You sometimes interrupt and you need to be careful about that."
I took this to heart. I prayed and I asked God to help me be a better listener. I asked God to give me wisdom.
My heart was so heavy over this. I didn't want to seem rude or like I was trying to be a Holy Spirit.
I felt confused.
When do I speak?
When do I just listen?
How do I know if I am talking too much and it's wrong, and how do I know when I am obeying the Spirit and offering encouragement?
I continued to pray through this struggle.
I emailed my husband, and shared with him that I knew he was right and I needed to "Preach the Gospel every day, if necessary use words." St. Francis Assissi
The very next day a pastor in our church said the SAME THING.
Two days later I went to Disneyland and a man with a long beard had a cool Christian shirt on. I couldn't read the text so I looked closer...it said, "Preach the Gospel every day, if necessary use words"
Wow LORD.
You are really speaking to me. You are speaking to my heart. I need to not just "talk" about the things of the LORD, I need to behave in a way that is loving and brings glory to God, even if it's without words.
I love it when God reveals Himself through His Word like this!!
I continued to struggle with this issue of feeling extremely low on discernment or "wisdom." I prayed and I even thought about buying books on wisdom and discernment. I know Proverbs is the book on wisdom, but I thought I might gain insight from a commentary on Proverbs or some other book on wisdom.
In my morning devotional reading from my one-year-Bible I came across Ecclesiastes. I started reading it and it took me a couple of days (duh!) when I realized I was reading one of the greatest books on wisdom from the greatest men who was endowed with wisdom, King Solomon and from the best book of all- God's Word.
I was blown away and I even chuckled with the LORD. I love His sense of humor. Here I am trying to find some additional reading material to help in wisdom and the Holy Spirit orchestrated the exact day, month and time when He knew I would need to read Ecclesiastes and learn about the foolishness of man and the wisdom that, we all know, begins and ends with the LORD.
[there is] a time to keep silence, And a time to speak; Ecclesiastes 3:7b
The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, And the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. Prov. 9:10
I will always be a talker.....but now I will try more to be sensitive to the Spirit and to others and to discern when to speak and when to be silent.
I learned:
1) God was pruning me. God did want me to change. God wanted me to listen to my husband's loving correction (thank you Jesus for my husband) that I need to be a better listener and I need to let the Holy Spirit lead me, not just talk/share all the time, it could be the wrong timing. Communication tone and surroundings are both important. Exp: If your spouse just had a long day at work, that is not the best time to share things....Let him/her have time to breathe and settle in and wait to share until the timing is right. (John 15:5)
2) God created me with a desire and hunger to share and encourage other believers. You (and I) can't stop God's work. God created you with a purpose and we all have very specific gifts. We must use them, but remember, we bless God when we honor Him with our gifts and talents as HE LEADS. (There are diversities of gifts, but the same Spirit. There are differences of ministries, but the same Lord. And there are diversities of activities, but it is the same God who works all in all.1 Cor. 12:4-6)
3.) I got spiritually attacked! The enemy was attacking me because he doesn't want us to encourage each other. He rather shut us up...that's what I started to do...be more quiet. But that was wrong. Forgive me Jesus. "The Spirit of the LORD spoke by me, And His word was on my tongue." 2 Sam 23:2
4.) Practice this- If God is placing someone on your heart and you want to share something. PRAY FIRST. READ God's Word and ask Him to reveal the scripture to share, the way to share, the time and place and ask the Holy Spirit to direct a divine appointment. (See Colossians 1:9; also If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. James 1:5)
5.) Remember the tongue is evil! We can use the same tongue to bless or encourage another believer or tear someone down. So be very cautious and PRAY WITHOUT CEASING. 1 Thess 5:17 (see James 3-But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. James 3:8)
I hope and pray this encourages anyone who like me, has put her foot in her mouth when trying to share something of the LORD. This is important stuff and the enemy wants to muzzle us from sharing God's Truth. Pray and seek the LORD, then open your mouth, preach the Gospel, if necessary use Words.
The Lord GOD has given Me The tongue of the learned, That I should know how to speak A word in season to him who is weary. Isaiah 50:4
This is encouraging! I’m a talker! My vocal cords are even damaged because of it, and my voice regularly goes out (I love to sing too so that makes things more difficult). Whenever I join a Bible study they have a question on the form that says something to the effect: Is there anything you should let your Leader know about? I state: I have a difficult time listening because I love to share, and I end up talking too much. The other night a dear sister, lovingly jokes with me with her hand making a yapping movement. I’m not offended because she’s just playing with me. I’ve had Leaders use hand gestures to stop me in my rambling track. I understand and don’t get offended anymore because I want to be submissive, and I want to accept that we are all different, and most of all I want to learn to speak when the time is right, like a word fitly spoken, like apples of gold in a silver setting. I love all my leaders by the way. They have been like mothers to me, and I’ve learned SO much. I always pray “ALL” the way to study, that God would set a guard over my mouth. But I begin to shake and words fly out anyway. I try really hard not to elaborate on anyone else’s answers even though I have a world of insight. How rude I am sometimes. Why can’t I simply accept others input as it is. *sigh*. Just recently with all good intentions, I shared on my FB about some of my Mothers testimony. I felt that it would help someone. But it made my sister angry. And rightly so! So I had to call my Mom up to confess my lack of loyalty, and Wisdom. I shared that analogy about squeezing out tooth paste, and wanting to put it all back. She forgave me thank God! But the Lord has also been speaking to my heart about being a listener to my very quiet and mellow husband. And that I need to introduce him to people because I forget that he's there when I'm talking to other women. He's always been behind the scene type person. But I love attention (which is an ugly sin I struggle with). Whelp, sorry I talked too much in my typing. I probably vented foolishly and exposed myself, but sometimes I simply can’t help it. I did save my throat. But I hope you understand a bit about what I understand with what you so graciously shared. It was encouraging to read the scriptures that I should meditate more often on. Love & blessings
ReplyDeletePs. I should mention that I am very thankful for the people who are paitent with me through this struggle, and accept me, and lovingly correct me.
Janette,
ReplyDeleteWow! Thank you so much for sharing your heart, your insights and your battle with this too. I am so encouraged. I know we talked (and talked and talked and talked LOL) about this at the retreat. We love to share! But sometimes in Bible study group for example, we need to be silent and allow the quiet ones to share...for they too are hearing from the LORD, they are just more reserved about what to share. I love the apples of gold verse...thank you for reminding me of that. Remember friend, it's a gift...God WANTS US to share with others the hope that is within us. When you are in God's Word soaking it up, enjoying it, feasting on it, you CAN'T HELP but share about God's goodness...but we have to be careful and allow the Spirit and not the flesh to lead us. I will pray for you...will you pray for me :) God bless you my dear sister. Love you so much!!!!