Two Different Nights with Jesus

Night one to ponder...
Luke 8:22-25 (NIV)

One day Jesus said to his disciples, “Let us go over to the other side of the lake.” So they got into a boat and set out. As they sailed, he fell asleep. A squall came down on the lake, so that the boat was being swamped, and they were in great danger.

The disciples went and woke him, saying, “Master, Master, we’re going to drown!”

He got up and rebuked the wind and the raging waters; the storm subsided, and all was calm. “Where is your faith?” he asked his disciples.

In fear and amazement they asked one another, “Who is this? He commands even the winds and the water, and they obey him.”

I love this picture.
It is one of my favorites images of the God-man, Messiah, Jesus.
He is so tired from ministering that he falls asleep on the boat.
Perhaps the ocean waves rocked Jesus (the Creator with skin on) to sleep.
Amazing.
I often put myself in Jesus' arms in the boat.
There are terrors all around.
Wind, waves, the boat is literally filling with water fast...
No worries; I am good.
I am safe and snuggled in my Lord's arms and if He says we are going to the other side of the lake, then nothing, not even a wind storm is going to change that.
We must remember Jesus is fully God and fully man.
Today God showed me the importance of calling out to Jesus' at night.
This is night one...
It is scary from a natural standpoint.
It is dangerous- no doubt.
Jesus can sleep...in this setting.
He is calm, settled, and assure of Himself. He and the disciples WILL get to the other side.
.....In contrast to night 2.

Night 2 to ponder...

Matthew 26:36-46 (NKJV) Then Jesus came with them to a place called Gethsemane, and said to the disciples, "Sit here while I go and pray over there.” And He took with Him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and He began to be sorrowful and deeply distressed. Then He said to them, “My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, even to death. Stay here and watch with Me.”
He went a little farther and fell on His face, and prayed, saying, “O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.”Then He came to the disciples and found them sleeping, and said to Peter, “What! Could you not watch with Me one hour? Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.”Again, a second time, He went away and prayed, saying, “O My Father, if this cup cannot pass away from Me unless I drink it, Your will be done.” And He came and found them asleep again, for their eyes were heavy. So He left them, went away again, and prayed the third time, saying the same words. Then He came to His disciples and said to them, “Are you still sleeping and resting? Behold, the hour is at hand, and the Son of Man is being betrayed into the hands of sinners. Rise, let us be going. See, My betrayer is at hand.”
On night two, things are ASTONISHINGLY different.

A prayer in a garden at night.

From a natural stand point this setting is quite peaceful.
The moonlight calms you, the stars are twinkling...
In Jesus' day there were no airplanes flying by, paramedic trucks racing down the highway or even the sound of a text notification.
There is nothing...
I imagine it very peaceful and tranquil.
Plus, Jesus is in the Garden. He might be surrounded by the scent of night blooming jasmine, and perhaps the fragrance of spring is all around.
In one sense, it might be the perfect environment for prayer and quiet reflection (the Scriptures tell us He departed here often to pray)
But this night was different....VERY different.
Jesus is deeply sorrowful...
He prays and begs God to let this cup pass from Him...nevertheless He models total submission to us by crying out "Not my will but Yours Abba be done!"
Jesus knew this was the very reason He came.
Here are important contrasts I noticed that refresh my soul.
The night with the windstorm....Jesus sleeps peacefully....
The cloudless calm night in the garden...Jesus stays up all night praying.
The difference is surrender.
In the first night, Jesus knew His mission and was not afraid of natural waves and wind or even the fear of drowning.
In the second night, Jesus is afraid. He is not afraid of the Cross. He knows exactly what will happen that night and the next and the next. He is afraid of the break in intimacy with His Father. He will be covered in our Sin (as Scriptures says "God made Him who knew no sin to BE sin for us)
We are so UNLIKE Jesus which is why we need to learn from Him, drink in the Scriptures and daily ask for the Holy Spirit to open our eyes and heighten our awareness.

When there are "physical" things that scare us, we freak out and panic.
When there is spiritual things that SHOULD scare us, we yawn, chill and choose sleep over prayer.

Oh LORD help us have hearts that are like yours.

When the night is scary, I want to be able to rest like you did, safe in God's plan and purpose.
When the night "appears" serene and tranquil, I want to stay up all night in prayer, and deny my temptation to complacency or lethargy. I want to deny sleep and rather seek Your face.

Days that might seem or appear easy, can spiritually be hard.
Nights that might seem hard, can be spiritually easy...

The point is we need to do as Jesus asks. We don't need to yell "Wake Up Jesus! Don't you care we are perishing?" Of course He cares!
We should instead listen when He tells us "Wake up! Don't you see your friends and family members are perishing. Stay up and pray and listen to what I desire to tell you"
Jesus loved us so much He willingly went to the manger, then the prayer garden to pray all night....then He was willing to walk up to Calvary and stretch out His hands for us.
He is God and He is Rabbi our teacher.

Let us learn from Him when to pray all night, and when to rest in the shaking boat.

Autism t-shirts

Autism Awareness Month 2019

T-Shirts 

Psalm 139:13-14

Scripture teaches us that each one of us is fearfully and wonderfully made by God.

However, let’s be real- people can be mean to others who are different than them.

When Isaac was small people would offer parenting advice to me in the stores. Isaac dropped a toy once. A mom picked it up and looked straight at Isaac and said 

“now say thank you” 

I explained that he was non-verbal had autism and could not talk. I said he knows some signs and I made the American Sign Language sign for

“thank you”

She felt embarrassed and apologized.

My husband was very determined that during our summer national park explorations we come prepared!

We have Isaac wear an autism t-shirt.

Some t-shirts have a puzzle piece.

Others say “Autism Awareness” or something clever about autism with a puzzle piece. 

My husband has a T-shirt that says “Autism dad”

We do this because it is so much easier than having awkward conversations with people.

I have burst into tears with people- teachers, counselors, the manager at our bank, and others. 

People can say weird things like 

“Do you think it was the vaccines?”

“Is he on a gluten free diet? My sister’s cousins neighbor’s coach’s son is on a gluten free diet and he’s so much better now”

It’s not that we special needs parents avoid “the talk” about autism.... it’s just that these conversations are complex. 

At times, I just need to make my bank deposit, or buy the bananas and I cannot adequately answer the tough questions a stranger asks me.

Some people aren’t rude, they are curious and I respect that.

From the mom’s perspective, I’m scanning the store or location to make sure Isaac doesn’t run away and it is very hard to discuss things.

Bottom line- the t-shirts help! 

Do you want to know what helps special needs parents?

Prayer.

Or Texting an encouraging verse.

Or Asking how are you?

...if you really want to get to know Isaac, come over and hang out with him at our house. His home is a familiar environment and he is much less anxious.

I’m thankful for t-shirts as they help us cope with the outside world! 

Phil 4:6-7 

What to Expect...

Remember that book 

“What to expect when you are expecting?”

It was a month by month explanation of what a first time mom should experience during her pregnancy.

It was very popular!

Before google, people would read books! A pregnant woman would read a book to learn from another woman what to expect. 

Why is this important?

None of us, man or woman likes unexpected surprises ... especially if the results might be negative.

A first time home buyer does not want to unexpectedly learn there is a sewer line near their home that emits a yucky smell several times a year.

A new teacher trained in upper grades does not want to unexpectedly learn she is teaching kindergarteners instead.

A beach marathon runner does not want to unexpectedly learn that this new marathon route has “hills” and lots of inclines.

Expectations. 

We all have them. 

We even place expectations on God, on people and on outcomes.

For example, if I eat healthy and drink water and exercise regularly I should maintain my weight.

A good definition of hope is 

“Confident expectation in God and in His purpose prevailing”

Hope can also be a confident expectant trust that God will work out things for the good, (Rom 8:28) even if my circumstances or feelings tell me something else (Prov 3:5-6) 

“The hope of the righteous will be gladness, But the expectation of the wicked will perish.”

Proverbs 10:28 NKJV

The hope of the righteous will be gladness.

What does this mean?

Well the righteous man or woman places hope in Jesus- not in a marriage, in health or wealth not in job or career, not in achievements or worldly success, hope for the righteous is found in God. 

So even if cancer knocks on your door, my hope is in God...

Even if the marriage fails, hope is in God to comfort and bring companionship... 

Even if the job isn’t what you dreamed it should be, hope is in God and you passionately serve Him with your gifts and talents...

Even if your dreams are shattered and even if there is a death, you can have hope- a confident expectation that God is God and He will work all things together for good to those who love God. 

Even on your most depressing day, you can say, “if I die, I will go to heaven and be with Jesus forever and ever and ever.”

We can let our hearts be filled with hope.

The One who knew you before you were in your mother’s womb, the one that saved you from a terrible relationship, the one who miraculously provided the funds for you when needed most, the one who gave you songs in the night, the one who leaves the ninety nine and is not willing that any should perish, that Supreme Almighty God, that same Jesus who bled and died, He will hold you and be your anchor in hope for the next day! You can wake up free and joy filled because even if the floor collapses under you, Jesus is the foundation beneath you. He holds you up.

“The hopes of the godly result in happiness, but the expectations of the wicked come to nothing.”

Proverbs 10:28 NLT

When we turn our eyes off the circumstances we can feel our frustrations turn to joy. Who is the King of the world? Me or Yahweh? 

God’s got this, so I can go to sleep.

This is a dramatic contrast to the expectations of the wicked.

The wicked are scheming all day long.

The wicked are so sneaky and crafty and desire to promote self. 

The wicked have expectations too.

“One day they will build a statue to me, because I’m that awesome!” 

They expect the world to worship them.

They say “get out of my way.”

“Get out of my lane.”

“I’m in charge.”

Their expectation is that the world, people and even God “owe” them something.

They expect close parking, VIP treatments, awards, praise and ultimately- worship. The wicked desire to be praised.

This is a lie!

The false expectations of the wicked will die with them. 

Think about it....

That cruel neighbor or relative....

Those funerals are so sad.

Most people attend because they are obligated. The words are brief and the atmosphere is not celebratory. The truth is- this person was mean and their memory fades because their life was self centered.

God sees all.

There are times when it appears the wicked person prospers while the righteous person struggles. 

This is true... 

Look at Joseph 

Look at Job

Look at Jesus

The key point is to remember it only appears as if the wicked prosper. 

It’s only an appearance.

A mirage.

Again, God sees all.

He sees the righteous when she places her hope in Him and waits confidently - He WILL turn her sorrow into joy.

But the wicked... their expectations will all fade and turn to nothing.

We must encourage ourselves in this Truth!

My hope is not in my employer though I work hard and get passed over for the promotion.

My hope is not in all the love and efforts as a wife and mother, if a family shows zero appreciation.

My hope is not in academics, when I realize I’m not as smart as I thought I was and failed a test. 

My hope is not even in my devotions (as important as they are!) because that would put the focus on self instead of Jesus. 

Grace grace grace.

Our confident expectation is in Christ’s unfailing love for me. 

Take an inventory.

When you get grumpy or bent out of shape over something-

Where was your expectation placed?

Hope in God- for He never fails. His ways are different yes, but He always knows best and from time to time He will allow our expectations to be demolished so we can redirect our gaze to Him. 

Lonely at Valentine’s Day

Feb 13, 2019

I woke up this day with her on my heart.

It’s almost Valentine’s Day... and she’s wounded I thought... 

Whether it was an intentional wound like divorce, adultery, abandonment or emotional withdrawal... she’s left alone.

I hate the commercial nature of Valentine’s Day.

I’ve been married for 20 years and no hallmark card, box of chocolate, red rose or gift can make me feel like knowing Jesus.

Jesus is the missing part.

Everyone needs Jesus, so we all carry that wound, or emptiness inside.

Only Jesus can fill us and make us fully satisfied. 

Dear sister- 

My prayer is that you will redeem the day! Hug your mom, dad, sister, brother, child, pet or even best friend, and know that God is “El Roi” He sees you. 

Oh yes He sees you.

He sees how you prayed and prayed for a spouse, for a life partner and the enemy robbed that from you.

He sees (now this applies only to some of you) 

how you ache when you must text this man who is now only known as 

“The kids’ father ” to ask for money because they are growing out of their shoes so quickly.

He (our Perfect Father) sees how TV shows like the Bachelor, or romantic comedies make you cringe, because deep deep down, you either

“Want” that Romance or you once had it and because of betrayal ... lost it... and really... it was a lie.

He sees your desire for romance...

Let God in.

It’s ok to cry today, or any other day you miss having a spouse, or close friend to connect with.

There is nothing wrong with that desire.

But dear one, I pray you don’t settle!

Don’t settle for the man who is not sold out to Christ. 

Or for the brother, don’t settle for the nice girl, who doesn’t read her Bible or desire to go to church or pray with you.

God didn’t settle for allowing you to linger in His outer courts. 

NO 

Jesus died, He sacrificed His body so you can come in... so you could come close... so you can enter into the throne room behind the veil.  Inside the veil (like a “dressing room” type area where only intimate people can see each other).

God wants you.

ALL OF YOU.

God desires the most intimate fantastic love with you.

Yes earthly relationships are wonderful...

But feelings fade....

Attractions even fade...

And a good marriage takes a lot of work.

God desires our marriages to be blessed with Him in the center...

If you are unmarried...or married...

Widowed... single... divorced.... or even separated... 

Let God love you.

Let God romance you.

Enjoy intimacy with the Lord.

Write love letters to Him and cry out all of your prayers.

Psalm 37:4

Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. 

Yes Sensei!

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding

Prov 9:10

January is the first month of the year...

Genesis is the first book of the Bible and when we read it, we see the “beginning” 

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Gen 1:1

John 1:1 reads “In the beginning was the Word” 

Let’s Jump forward to John’s Gospel.

John 13:3-7 

“Jesus knew that the Father had delivered all things into His hands, and that He had come from God and was returning to God. So He got up from the supper, laid aside His outer garments, and wrapped a towel around His waist. After that, He poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and dry them with the towel that was around Him. He came to Simon Peter, who asked Him, “Lord, are You going to wash my feet?”Jesus replied, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.” 

I love this picture and I love and treasure Jesus’ words here. You see I often wonder at what in the world Jesus is up to.

I know Jesus is Lord, King, Sovereign and able to do above and beyond all I could ask or think of... 

....but I don’t get it....

I just don’t understand what He is up to.

I love the movie Karate Kid.

I can watch it over and over again.

We love when the kid that gets bullied ends up winning the trophy.

It’s awesome!

The other day I was thinking about how as Christians we are in training.

Psalm 18:34

He trains my hands for battle; my arms can bend a bow of bronze. 

Psalm 144:1

Blessed be the LORD, my rock, Who trains my hands for war, And my fingers for battle; 

We are in a REAL spiritual battle.

We get that.

Jesus is the Victor.

We get that too.

But your methods Lord... they seem kind of odd, kind of weird, kind of strange.

Enter Mr Myagi.

Where did Daniel go to initially to learn karate?

He went to the Cobra Kai studio.

He went to the “world’s” way of training 

This would not work.

He needed a new Sensei ...(or teacher)

He goes to Mr Myagi who tells him to wax the car. Wax on, wax off...

You gotta be kidding me.

Then paint the fence...

Not right and left horizontally... but up and down.... breathe in, breathe out.

Daniel did not understand Mr Myagi’s methods and in fact at one point he starts feeling like a fool.

But then Mr Myagi lets loose and let’s Daniel in on something...

He has been teaching him Karate the whole time! 

Similarly, our Rabbi, our Master Teacher Jesus is slowly, faithfully, and daily teaching us...

Wax, on wax off...

Breathe in, breathe out...

Since “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding” 

Prov 9:10 we must go back to the beginning.

Fear God.

That’s step one.

Reverence Him

Worship Him. 

Learn His ways.

Study the Gospels.

Notice sometimes Jesus is stern (He calls the religious leaders out “you are white washed walls.” Ouch!) 

Other times He is tender, holding up children and praying for them.

Jesus.

He is our sensei.

He wants us to learn from Him!

He actually says “Learn from me”

Matthew 11:28-30

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

I do not understand His methods of training.

I might feel foolish, but I choose to fight my flesh and my strong desire to “understand “ what Jesus is doing...

Instead, I will daily check in with Him

“What is on the agenda today Jesus ?” 

Paint a fence, wash the car, sand the floor? Fold clothes, pray with someone? 

I’ll do it; I’ll obey because I trust you and I will obey your teachings... you are training me to be a warrior for your kingdom! 

Reward, Achievement and Checking the Box

A friend of mine in law school once said  

“Cs get degrees” 

I had never heard that before!

Average...

Most of us don’t want to be average.

Some of us are programmed to be “do-ers” 

There are lots of dreamers but the key is do-ers

Jon Courson said recently in a sermon... 

“Successful people get things done ...”

True. 

Now is the time to follow through !

Give Jesus your best- the morning devotion, your heart, the tithe, etc. 

Though he was rich yet for your sake he became poor!

But for some of us we tend to be natural at getting grades or earning trophies or driven to be busy with activity we need to focus on what Jesus did when he departed to pray...
We need to slow down...
Jesus was about His Father ‘s business...

Jesus was able to set aside those early morning intimate moments with God to pray ...to be still ... 

I cannot be so activity driven that I use up all of my energy and become depleted and drained. 

Remember when Jesus  was in the boat? He was sleeping... He was so exhausted from ministry and then the wind and the waves begin to come and they said (paraphrase)

“Jesus! Wake up! Don’t  you care that we’re perishing? 

Jesus rebuked them. He calmed the wind and waves, but He was troubled at their assessment of the situation. 

I can get depleted, drained fatigued.

But I don’t stop...

I keep going...

Now I must confess, I do sleep well

7-8 hours every night.

But for me, getting sleep is not the issue.

For me, I need to not beat myself up if my “to do” list is too long, or I don’t complete the tasks I have assigned myself.

I need to during the day to stop and pray and read, or to just breathe.

I often ... go go go go. 

And God is telling me to slow down.

You see for me, I love to be still. I love to sit in a prayer meeting or at a retreat and date Jesus. For me, that’s not the issue... the issue is my daily activity driven behavior that incorrectly skew my view of my self.

I got 10 things done. 

Woo-hoo I had a great day.

I only accomplished 4 things today. Man God, am I lazy, was I on social media too much? Please God help me be better at time management 

Laura- 

Time management isn’t the issue- your estimation of a successful day, or unsuccessful day is the problem.

This is the day the Lord has made, not this is the day Laura has made.

I’m the maker of heaven and earth and I am the one who gives your life value and meaning!

I made you to be like Mary, so stop trying to be like Martha. 

I read a beautiful article : 

“10 Ways to Simplify Your Life in 2019”

And here are some take aways I learned ... 

Ask yourself “is that little check mark worth it?” 

“It’s not all about saying ‘no’—you also need to know when to say ‘yes.’ Approach God in prayer and ask Him to lead you. God will show you what He needs from you. Before you fill your calendar, ask where He may need you to leave a little space open for Him.”

Look at what God told Abraham 

Genesis 15:1

 After this, the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision:

“Do not be afraid, Abram.

    I am your shield,

    your very great reward”

God Himself is the reward we are all longing for. Not checked boxes, or even ministries we have completed... but to truly be like Mary- sitting at Jesus’ feet is the ultimate reward! 

To Transfer This Pain, Press 1

Pain transference 

A friend of mine was going through a tough trial.

Her heart was so heavy she said she thought about driving over the edge of the freeway... trying to kill her self.

At that moment God spoke to her heart saying: 

“If you do that, the pain won’t go away, it will just be transferred”

This Truth has stuck with me and I’m thankful for it. 

Pain doesn’t evaporate.

Pain might lessen or get dulled over time, but it’s still there...

When a little girl is hurt by her daddy, that pain gets transferred to her boyfriend or perhaps later to a husband.

When a little boy is hurt by others, he can later become a bully at his workplace. 

When a parent dies young, that pain can be transferred to drinking, drug use, party life, or even anger towards God. 

When someone kills himself, the pain often gets transferred to the family.

The pain doesn’t go away... it’s just transferred.

We all walk around with wounds. 

However, we don’t have to live wounded. 

The wounds don’t leave us, but we can choose to transfer the pain to Jesus.

Jesus is the ultimate pain taker.

One thing I have learned about pain is that it makes us humans vulnerable and irrational.

I remember a friend telling me that when she was giving birth to her first child (without an epidural) she thought, “Jesus just take me. Kill me now, because this pain is not tolerable!” 

Yes child birth is indeed painful (with or without an epidural) but to wish for death in that moment is not reasonable or rationale. 

Pain calls for a release and relief- that’s where Jesus comes in...  

Here’s the amazing thing about God-

He knows all about pain and He wants us, invites us to transfer it to Him. 

Jesus knows pain ... personally.

He was despised and rejected by mankind, a man of suffering, and familiar with pain. Like one from whom people hide their faces he was despised, and we held him in low esteem

Isaiah 53:3 (NIV) 

Surely our griefs He Himself bore, And our sorrows He carried; Yet we ourselves esteemed Him stricken, Smitten of God, and afflicted.

Isaiah 53:4 

NASB 

Familiar with pain and yet He invites us to give it to Him, to transfer it to Him.

“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.””

Matthew 11:28-30 NKJV

Dear beloved in Christ, 

I’m sorry for the pain you are enduring. I’m sorry for the hurt that just seems to never go away. Please know you are not alone. God knows what pain is like. He watched as Jesus hung on the cross to save the world. God is not a distant being, He is as close as your breathe. The pain you experienced feels unnatural and that is because you are not made for this world. Jesus created you for heaven, for eternal life. Transfer your pain to Jesus, hand it to Him because it’s not your pain to bear. He wants to carry it for you. Yes you will feel the wound, but you will always smile knowing Jesus took the bigger share of pain and He will right all wrongs one day in heaven.