Pain- Friend or Acquaintance

 I shared with her while she was grieving and...weeping...

"I understand a little bit about pain." It's like "pain is my friend."

"No" she said. "Pain is not your friend."

She was correct. I misspoke. What I meant to say was that pain was "familiar."

I have been thinking about this and pondering the concept of being familiar with pain.

I do not want to walk around like a forever wounded person.

I am free.

I am more than a conqueror in Christ.

However, I do still live every day with the reality of raising a special needs child. 

A child who now wears a 9.5 in Mens shoes. 

A child who cannot clearly state his address or phone number or say his birthdate.

Yes, autism is painful. Autism is familiar and therefore pain is familiar.

I do not want to "stay" in pain/survival mode.

For those of you who know me, you know I am a joyful person. I am not painful to be around (I hope not)

I love Jesus and want to exude His joy, His love, share His Word, His light and encourage others to "keep on keeping on."

I do not want pain to be my friend.

A dear sister in Christ shared with me that she has been waking up at night filled with anxiety.

She says it is because she feels like she must "anticipate" the next bad, or hard or challenging thing that will afflict her life next.

Another sister said she is always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

When you get used to pain, when there is relief for a minute, your brain might sense you are living "in between" trials so to speak. You have your foot hovering over the brake...

This is not healthy which is why I want to expose this...

Isaac has been in a really beautiful season.

He is happy to be back at school. He has not had aggressive behaviors in a long time. He takes his medications every morning and afternoon. He even made a friend at school. No seizures since Nov 29 2020. 

So much to be thankful for!

I am not waiting for the shoe to drop.

I am thankful...I don't wake up anxious. 

Anxiety has not been a problem for me.

My problem is pain.

When others hurt, I hurt.

When others grieve, I grieve.

When others need prayer, I go to battle.

When God calls me to intercede in the middle of the night, I pray "pretending to be asleep" I quietly pray as the LORD leads me.

Sometimes waves of grief sweep over me. 

For example, next month is Valentine's day, the "love month." Now as Christians we know love is Jesus. Jesus is love personified. But for me, I start praying for all the widows who will have their first "husband-less" Valentine's day. To some it may seem superficial, but if you had a spouse who spoiled you on this day and made sure to tell you he loved you with flowers, a card and a lovely dinner, then the day is a big stab in the heart. The LORD prompts my prayers for widows.

How about the "1 year markers." 

Feb 19, 2022 marks one year since my beloved sister in Christ Victoria went home to be with Jesus. I ache and pray for her family often. 

I read an article about a family that was hit by a drunk driver. Three yes THREE siblings all died in the car accident. The mother was in the car too and was rushed to the hospital to fight for her life and did not yet know that her 3 youngest children all passed away. I read this article and cried and asked God to carry this family.

The LORD reminds me that I am a chaplain. No I am not an official chaplain. But I run into these situations and pray and sit and love on people who need Jesus...

The LORD reminded me that HE was familiar with pain.

That He knows and understands pain too.

We are not promised a "pain free" life we are promised He will never leave us nor forsake us.

Have you ever heard a mom say "giving birth was a breeze. It was pain free!"

Absolutely not!

Labor is painful- BUT WORTH IT.

Jesus is worth it.

God reminded me that pain IS NOT my friend. Pain is not my enemy either. 

Pain is an "acquaintance."

An acquaintance is "a person's knowledge or experience of something. Also, a person one knows slightly but who is not a close friend.

BING!

Light bulb!

Isaiah 53:3 says: "He is despised and rejected by men. A Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief. And we hid, as it were our faces from Him; He was despised and we did not esteem Him." (NKJV)

The NLT reads: 

He was despised and rejected- a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief. We turned our backs on Him and looked the other way. He was despised and we did not care.

One version says "He is despised" the other reads "He was despised." This is interesting.

Is Jesus despised today? Yes. Was Jesus despised then? Yes. 

Jesus knows how we feel and He too feels our pain.

Pain is NOT my friend.

Pain is NOT your friend either. 

Pain is an acquaintance. Perhaps our lives are touched by pain so that we can empathize with others. So we can weep with others and rejoice with others.

Pain also heightens gratitude. 

I have a friend who struggled with infertility.

When she got pregnant after years of trying I was so overjoyed I felt like I could burst!

I am excited any time someone is pregnant but this one was different. This friend had years filled with pain. She had many "no's" before she got her "yes."

Pain teaches us how to lean on Jesus and how to be thankful for each gift. 

Warren Wiersbe says that pain and suffering can make us bitter. However, if we choose to make pain our "servant" instead of our master, then we see how Romans 8:28, Gen 50:20 and 2 Cor 1:4 are literally lived out in our lives.

2 Corinthians 1:4 (NLT) reads: 

"He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us."

We must learn lessons from the painful moments and seasons and hide them in our hearts. Then at just the right moment, God will give us an assignment. It's as if we go through the pain, only to be the catalyst to ministry later.
God is prompting our hearts "I now want YOU to share! Share the verses, the treasures, the tools, the memorial stones YOU gathered from your pain-filled journey to encourage another." 

Pain is never wasted!

What a friend we have in Jesus! When we go through pain He weeps with us, lays His hand on our shoulder and says "I am holding your tears in a bottle." "I am near to the broken hearted." "I will restore the joy of your salvation" and truly "blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted."

Jesus was acquainted with pain and He had deep compassion and He implants this gift in us too. 

Let's worship Him and be thankful for heaven where there are no more tears--- only endless praise!

Maranatha!